There are many moments going through divorce and heartbreak where the loneliness can engulf you.
Those of us navigating the deep dark waters of these trials are no stranger to this loneliness. In fact many of us experienced this when our ex partner was lying right beside us. We may have not declared to the world yet we were getting a divorce, or even decided ourselves, but deep down the complacency and deep loneliness was eating away at what was left of the relationship.
Truth is a person is not the cure. In fact many of us have looked for ways to numb this deep seeded lonliness through many different cure experiments. Sex, drugs, and alcohol are always the big ones, but it’s often the little cure experiments that can be just as harmful: food, exercise, work, social media, porn, even new friendships. All of these can be used as things we try to solve our deep seeded loneliness.
The thing I have found is whenever we have a deep seeded fear of something the only way out is to actually face it head on. It’s kinda like the monster under the bed. We can lie there and let the fear consume us. We can call people into the room to help calm us and tell us there is no monster, we can look up things online to help calm our nerves about the lack of evidence monsters exist. We can eat comforting foods to distract us and even buy all sorts of things online to help our monster fears. But the fear itself is only dissolved when we gather up the courage to look under the bed with our very own eyes and face our fear DEAD ON. When we do so we realize there is nothing there to fear. It all dissipates, and we can finally go to sleep.
By facing your fears you free yourself. So facing your fear of loneliness, facing your fear of failure facing your fear of anything is the key.
I help my clients do this through a basic technique of fear clearing. We cover all sorts of areas from body and health fears, to fears of failure and being alone. If you are interested in a clearing session I would love to chat with you about that. Shoot an email to me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
In the meantime, don’t try to avoid it. Feel it. FEEL all of it. Allow yourself to go there. What if you are alone and lonely for the rest of your life? What if you always struggle with money or your health? What if things are always contentious between you and your ex? Allow yourself to feel it fully till it starts to soften. Slowly it will. You will realize there is no power there. In THAT lies your freedom.
You are loved,